Single White Females like Surveys

[The Rules]

1. You must post the rules.

2. Post 11 fun facts about yourself on the blog post.

3. Answer the questions the tagger set for you in their post, and then create 11 new questions to ask the people you've tagged.

4. Tag 4 people and link them on your post

5. Let them know you've tagged them!

[Fun Facts About SWF]

1. I snort when I laugh. It's a real thing and I don't know how to stop it.

2. I'm deathly scared of completely irrational things like whales, black holes, and feet. Especially MY feet. Socks, shoes, and/or slippers are a constant in my life.

3. I have 3 tattoos and I usually lie about what they're about. It's fun to see what people will actually believe.

4. I lived in Maastricht, The Netherlands for 3 months my junior year of college. I had the opportunity to travel Europe with some amazing people that transformed my life in a major way and created some friendships that will carry until I'm nasty old and covered in wrinkles. From this, I have a thirst for travel and the hope to eventually move back one day. [FYI: I hated putting this, to be honest, because LITERALLY every single person that has studied abroad probably has, at one point or anther, spit out this same exact jargon. However, this is such a huge part of me that it had to make the cut. JUDGE ME.]

5. I don't like to sleep because I always feel like I'm going to miss out on something. I think this could be interpreted into some deeper issue but...WHATEVER GUYS.

6. I am a Christian that strongly supports gay marriage. If ya don't like it, glitter bomb me.

7. I have two roommates. They're a little bit older, kinda bossy, and always leave the kitchen light on for me when I'm out late. Yup...meet my mom and dad, Marie and Steve.

8. I was born in Philadelphia, but don't hold it against me. Total southerner at heart, y'all. I can only pray that I never permanently leave the great state of Texas. I do, however, have a soft spot for the Jersey Shore.

9. I have a furry child named Olive St. John Decker. She is named after the character 'Olive' in my favorite movie, Little Miss Sunshine. [Those red boots really tug at my heart strings.] Her middle name, St. John, is a tribute to one of my best friends who's parents had the foresight to bless her with such a strong middle name.

10. I'm really scared of babies because I think they are going to break and that they will pee on me. I want to like them someday because I feel like this isn't exactly a winning quality.

11. I love to dance even though I lack rhythm. My best move consists of me whipping my hair around. Total white girl move, I know. Two stepping, however, is a completely different story and I still have no clue how my feet are suppose to move. To every guy that has attempted to teach me, I apologize to your toes.

[My questions for you!]

1. What is your favorite time of the year?

The very beginning of summer.

2. Do you sing in the shower?

No. I rap.

3. What makes you the happiest?

Reuniting with friends and family. Olive St. John. Loving and being loved.

4. Where is your favorite place to shop for clothing or accessories?

Nordstrom always has something I need.

5. What is one thing you've learned about yourself in the last year?

I've learned that I am not the one in control. Only He has the plan.

6. What is your favorite childhood memory?

Being down at the Jersey Shore at Dot and Ed's house every summer with the entire Reiher clan.

7. If you could vacation anywhere in the world tomorrow, where would you choose to go?

Ireland.

8. What are three things you hope to accomplish during the next 10 years?

Move out of my parents house. Find a big girl job that I'm passionate about. Settle down....a bit.

9. What is the last thing you purchased?

Fountain drink from the gas station on Baylor's campus: half diet coke, half coke. Best purchase I've made in a long while.

10. Who is the last person you said "I love you" to?

My sister when I left Waco this afternoon.

11. Who is your favorite author/ what is your favorite book?

John Steinbeck is my favorite author. East of Eden is my favorite book. Do yourself a massive favor and read it.

Your turn!

1. Keely at "Greg, Keely and The Moose"

2. Kristina at "SWF"

3. Courtney at "Little Moments"

4. Carissa at "Eskimo Kisses"

I'm a SWF because...I hate commitment.

One of the major reasons that I have fallen in to the SWF genre is that I have an extreme fear of commitment. And it goes beyond relationship stuff. I mean, I have a hard enough time choosing what kind of shampoo to purchase during my weekly Target migration.

Do I want to have smooth, straight locks or the volumizing power of Adele? Cucumber melon or Pomegranate? Two in one or the traditional shampoo?

[Just kidding. No one ever actually chooses that stuff unless they are a 40 year old man. Who lives without the influence of any sort of woman/female/lady/cat].

Even this hypothetical situation is inducing stress.

So I think it is obvious to say that having regular postings?

Never gonna happen.

- SWF

SWF Evenings: Part 1

As previously mentioned, the SWF spends many evenings alone at home. While this may seem unremarkable to some, the SWF relishes in this pivotal time devoted solely to her glorious self.



This is the time when you can throw on your swank silk robe, pour yourself a glass brimming with sparkling wine, and massage on your favorite face mask while tuning into a great black & white you found on TCM.



Or...This is the time when you can throw on those sweats you've had lying on the floor of your bedroom for the past week, crack open a fresh box of room temperature Franzia, and catch up on The Bachelor/The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills/trashy reality show thats been sitting on the DVR for the past week, all with a face full of day old makeup.

Whichever. I think you know which one applies to me.

I am extensively selfish (in the adorable/charming way) and therefore cherish these evenings. So for the next week, SWFLA will take a closer look at these introverted moments I cherish dearly.

So ladies, a successful evening in doesn't just materialize like gays at a Britney concert. No, it requires a little effort and a few products that any true SWF would have in constant supply. Namely: a Bath Bomb.

Baths are an extremely necessary and undervalued part of life that we SWF have been taking full advantage of for years. It's relaxing, it's indulgent and, best of all, it's a great way to procrastinate doing anything productive like laundry or going to the gym. To really enjoy a bath SWF style, you're going to need to grab a couple Bath Bombs from Lush. Fill your bath tub with warm water and chunk it in. Some are fizzy, some are soothing, some are invigorating, and some do serious magic to those ashy knees that you haven't moisturized since last summer. You can't go wrong here. Everything is handmade, created in the USA, and are not tested on our furry friends. So whenever you make a purchase at Lush, you basically become an awesome human and humanitarian. This thought alone makes me want to give someone a high five.

So crank up some Ray LeMontagne, toss your bath bomb in the tub, and enjoy your evening.

- SWF

Music Monday: Santigold, Big Mouth

Defining a SWF

The always poignant Urban Dictionary defines a SWF as an acronym for "single, white female; an abbreviation often used in personal ads."

I am this very definition, except I do not frequent internet dating sites on lonely weeknights, desperately peppering my bios with the label SWF while swilling glass after very full glass of Franzia.

I am single. I am white. And I am most definitely female.

But being a SWF is more than just being a sometimes lonely, always pale female.

It’s about spending hours at the gym and ruining it in 20 minutes into our annual Thursday happy hour. It’s about our awkward obsession with small, furry cats, kittens, and sometimes puppies. It’s about our deep belief that Ryan Gosling is truly our betrothed. It’s about our constant failures in the kitchen and the mess that they inevitably yield. It’s about our personal war with self-tanners. It’s about finding our glitter covered gay best friend, where ever he may be.

This blog is about what it means to be a twenty-something SWF, living alone and sorting through the strange intricacies that life throws.